In my last post I raved about the Steven Pressfield book, The War of Art. In it, under the heading Resistance and Love, he writes, “The opposite of love isn’t hate; it’s indifference.”
Indifference, being ignored, given the silent treatment, snubbed — these passive acts of hostility are generally, in my case, more perceived than real; nevertheless, it’s the first thing I think when I’m not being responded to in the timely fashion I expect. Currently, several of my novel related phone messages and e-mails have not been answered. This makes me crazy. Clearly, I’m not a top priority. Rats! I hate not being number one. What can I say, I’m a Leo, or is that just being human? At any rate, I know full-well that I’m insatiable when it comes to getting attention — positive attention preferred. No amount will ever be enough. Let’s face it, I’m an attention glutton.
The question then becomes, What am I going to do about it?
The answer? Stop it. Stop expecting people to perform to my little script.
It helps to stay in the moment, and here is an example of one recent, most gratifying moment. I do volunteer work one day a week at a local all-boys, reform school — Hanna Boys Center. It’s a residential, certified high school. Their tagline is: “Where hurt is turned into hope.” I read one-on-one with the students. Because I couldn’t read as a kid, I have a particular sensitivity to where they’re missing the author’s point. We talk about what is being said and how it may pertain to their own experiences. Three of the Hanna boys attended my book launch: Alejandro, Darrell, and Robbie. Four days later, I was reading Animal Farm with Alejandro, a two-hundred-plus pound, sixteen year old, gang escapee. In the middle of his reading, unsure of exactly how to ask, shy but trying to appear tough, he said, “So Miss,” that’s how the boys often refer to me or any of the female staff, “So Miss, how long it take you to write that?”
He wanted to know because he was thinking about trying to write something of his own. I believe I got his attention and made an impression. He got my attention. No indifference, lots of love.
Have a good week, and I’ll post again next Friday.
P.S. If you have any thoughts to share, I love to read them in the comment box.
Thank you for these great suggestions Rita. I am going to start subscribing to The Writer’s digest today. And I like your challenge to push harder for a publisher with the next novel. It will be interesting to compare and contrast the two experiences. Thanks for your friendship and contributions.
Terry – Did you know that The Writer’s Digest has an International Self-Published Book Awards? I didn’t either, but I recently subscribed and the current issue has the winners. Pick up a copy. I love this magazine.
I love to argue with the pundits that write those articles about how to survive the current economic-whatever-it-is by canceling all newspaper and magazine subscriptions. Oddly, they are writers. That would be like musicians urging you to only listen to music you borrow from the library, also. Being a writer has spurred me on to buy more books and magazines (and yes – even newspapers) than ever. If civilization does finally crash, I have plenty of reading material. In fact, I can hardly wait.
So, Terry, I challenge you to make your next novel one that you intend to submit to a publisher, so that you will get attention without having to always arrange it yourself (book signings, etc.). If anyone other than me is still reading books and magazines, there will be reviewers for your publisher to send copies to. I wonder why they don’t review self-published work. Sounds like politics.
I enjoy the blog.
Rita
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